Well now here’s a subject I certainly did not see me writing about in my blog posts anytime soon or never! But this past couple of weeks I have had a real shift in awareness when it comes to this area in my life.
Now anyone who knows me, knows that I like to do my own thing. Pretty much always have and possibly always will!
I have always been a bit of a “Free spirit with a rebellious streak” let’s just say. Now whilst this can sometimes be funny, liberating and even at times an advantage but in the long run how well has it really served me?
As I am currently on a lesson in my studies about becoming “The most valuable person” I am being prompted to really take a good look at oneself and understand exactly how valuable I am as a person?
This is not in the context of a general human being, this is in the context of what I bring to the table as a human being, a business owner, a follower, a leader, a member of society etc etc….. I sometimes wish I hadn’t started this personal development journey because when you know you know!!
I jest, it is a great journey to be on but also a difficult journey of self realisation. I may have many great strengths, skills and successes in different areas but what I really have come to realise is that I AM NOT A GREAT FOLLOWER OR A GREAT LEADER!
My general pattern of life is that yes I will follow a teaching of something I want to learn but very very quickly my brain moves on to the next thing, I get frustrated, I get bored and I check out. I only really do the basics of what the leader tells me to do, enough to get me by lets just say.
WHY THE FECK DO I DO THIS WHEN I AM THE ONE ASKING FOR THE HELP??
I suddenly get an AHA moment as the penny finally drops, I have an issue with Authority!! I have developed a deep subconscious story that authority of any description must be bad and when I don’t like how things are going, I start to get bored or if feel a bit of heat I close the door and it’s done, over, I am outta there like “3 men and a wee lad” as we say in Belfast HAHA.
Now isn’t that interesting? How have I gained a much deeper understanding of this? One of the things that really made me think about it was this question.
Are you a Follower or are you a Leader? And of course my answer was I am neither, I don’t really follow and I don’t really lead. I’m a free spirit with my own mind have you not noticed?!?!
Oh my gosh if I had the emoji of your a dick I would insert it here haha.. What a knob I am saying to myself right now!! Why has this taken me so long to really understand?!
So many factors for me to think about here, something I am really going to improve on because without developing myself in this area I definitely will not be the person I am hoping to be anytime soon. Who is that kind of person you might be asking?
Let's just say, A most valuable person has just learnt a most valuable lesson!!